If you haven’t read Part 1, here it is. It breaks down how to prepare for the first coffee chat. 

Here are some guidelines for having a successful first chat.

1. Lead the call

The person you’re calling is doing you a favor by getting on the phone. They’ve been working all day, and the last thing they want is another meeting. Make it easy for them – talk first.

After the obligatory “how are you”, say something along the lines of:

If it’s ok with you, I’d love to introduce myself, hear about your background, and then jump into some questions I have.

A clear agenda goes a long way. It shows you’re prepared and respect their time.

2. Keep the Energy Up

You set the tone. If you sound bored, they’ll match that energy. If you sound engaged, they’ll reciprocate. Enthusiasm is contagious – lean into it.

This doesn’t mean overdo it. Just be present, smile, and show you care about the conversation.

3. It’s not an interview

You have your list of questions. Good. But don’t treat it like a checklist. It’s a conversation, not an interview.

If they mention something interesting – even if it’s off topic – dig into it. A good, seemingly unrelated follow-up is worth more than whatever you originally planned to ask.

One alumni told me the best coffee chat he’s had was when they talked about hockey more than banking.

4. Listen

Obvious, but not always done in practice. 

Too often, we focus on what we’ll say next instead of what’s actually being said.

5. Watch the time

Most coffee chats are 15-20 minutes. They may not cut you off, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t checking the clock.

Around the 15 minute mark, say something like:

I want to make sure I’m not keeping you too long, how are we on time?

This makes you organized, professional, and considerate. If they’re enjoying the chat, they may want to continue. If not, you’ve left a good impression.